So there’s so much happening out there and you really are losing your mind about how to raise your child into a sensible and happy kid, without going overboard or without losing it, right?
Well, here are a few things you should definitely keep your child away from. Of course as a parent, you know what’s best for your baby, but some of these you should definitely take a look at:
1. Comparison: This is one of the most important and damaging things you can subject your child to, so make sure you never compare your child to another. All babies and kids are different, unique and special, and cherish what’s special in yours, instead of comparing to others.
2. Spousal Anger/Disagreements: As parents, you and your partner are bound to disagree on different aspects of parenting, and while most times your discussions may be civil, there will be times when you can surely be blowing off some steam, and the conflicts become ever too obvious. Make sure whatever confrontations, name calling or fight you have, even a loud discussion that’s not necessarily angry, keep it all away from your little one’s eyes. You may be ‘just discussing’ but for your kid, this can be quite harmful.
3. Technology overdose: In this day and age, it’s not something you can entirely keep your kid away from, but make sure you’re not giving too much technology to your child. Of course you can’t completely avoid it, but you can surely limit the exposure, right? Right, you can!
4. Intentional embarrassment: In a bid to discipline erring kids, many parents end up resorting to embarrassing them in front of others. While you may feel this will stop your kid from doing whatever it is you don’t want them to do, this can actually lead to a reverse effect, one that will also harm the emotional balance of your child.
5. Threats: Yes, parenting is difficult, no one said it’s a piece of cake. But remember that you are the parent, the adult, and under no circumstances are you allowed to threaten the kid in front of you. Use your justification as much as you want, but no amount of problems or not-being-able-to’s should give you the excuse to threaten your kid.
6. “You disappoint me”: As a parent, you’re never allowed to say this. For your child, you are still the one-and-all (and as a parent you may be wishing this happens for quite some time to come), and saying this to your child repeatedly will end up causing serious insecurities and emotional issues, especially while growing up. Please refrain from using such negativity and if you absolutely must try and settle an issue with sternness, choose your words carefully.
7. Not believing in your kids: Being the parent, you should be the one who believes in your kid the most. Of course they will go through many trial and error methods and there’s a lot of learning they need to do, but you’ll be surprose at how many obstacles they can overcome purely on the strength of your belief in them. Love them, believe in them, cherish them!
8. Because I said so: Try and use this phrase as less as you can. Whatever you’re teaching your kids should be backed by adequate logic and understanding, and simply telling your kids repeatedly ‘because I said so’ will only turn them into mechanical kids, who may soon stop asking questions, being curious and trying to find reason. Let them ask why you said so, let them understand the reason behind what you’re saying, the more they understand, the likelier they are to listen.
9. Over-appreciation: While every painting your child creates may look like a masterpiece to you (and we’re not denying that it is), going overboard with your appreciation may end up doing more harm than good. It’s a real harsh world out there, competitive, over-the-edge and filled with equally talented kids, and you, as parent, need to make your child realise that they’re not living in a fairy-tale world. Of course you should be appreciating them, but understand how much appreciation is good and when you’re going overboard.
10. Bribing: Equally damaging as ‘threatening’ your child. ‘Do this and I will give you that’ – this is clearly one of the biggest parenting mistakes and goof-up that you can do. Refrain, immediately!